Celebrant Pam Meily Vetter


	Celebrating Life Everyone Has A Story...

On May 5th, 1928, Lizzy was given the Chinese name Shiu Wai Sum when she was born in Macau, which was under Portuguese rule at the time. She was born into a large family with twelve children. The first seven children were all boys. Her parents had been longing for a girl and finally, the eighth born child was their first daughter. Lizzy was the ninth born child. Another daughter was born as the tenth child and the last two children were sons. The daughters had a very close relationship with each other as they were growing up. Her father said Lizzy should have been a boy because she was so ambitious from a young age.

Lizzy was an active child, who liked swimming. She also had early talents as she enjoyed knitting and sewing ladies clothing. After finishing her early schooling, she went on to the University and earned a degree in Economics. At that time in history, it was very unusual for girls to go to college. But, Lizzy came from a wealthy family and her father made sure his daughters got a good education just like his sons.

It was after her graduation from the University, when she worked as an accountant and a private tutor that she met her future husband, William, who worked in pharmaceutical sales. Lizzy was a private tutor to one of William's nieces. The couple dated for a few years. They had things in common as they went swimming at the same place and they liked to go to the movies together. William appreciated Lizzy very much because she was very attentive to details, she emphasized education, and they shared the same values.

William and Lizzy married in a traditional Chinese wedding ceremony in 1956. After the couple married, William became a Pharmacist in Hong Kong while Lizzy worked as the chief accountant at a large textile and manufacturing firm. In the years ahead, the couple had four wonderful children who were all born in Hong Kong: Anthony, Belinda, Carson, and Delia.

A devoted mother, Lizzy always thought of each one of her children first. She was the matriarch of the family, but really both Lizzy and William worked together to guide their children toward success. They made a good team as parents.
With William's support, Lizzy's emphasis was on education and she always made sure the children did their homework and studied. She emphasized their studies, a good education, and self-sufficiency. She also stressed the importance of having good character, not only when people were watching, but all of the time.

Before Carson was five-years-old, he went to a piano store with his parents and he refused to leave. He needed to touch and play the piano. William and Lizzy saw Carson's interest and being practical, Lizzy purchased a second hand piano. She wanted to expose her children to a musical education because she didn't have that opportunity growing up. Every Saturday, the children took piano lessons and they practiced at home. Lizzy really wanted the children to have a knowledge of music and it was a precious gift that she could give to her children.

Lizzy wanted all of their children to succeed in all of their endeavors. The children were on schedules and learned through discipline. She believed in her children doing their best in whatever they wanted to do, no matter how minor. She told her children, "never give up," and she kept pushing them toward success and their own independence. Lizzy wanted her children to be self-sufficient, strong and to do the right thing. She was very straight forward in her approach.

If you ask any of her children, they will tell you that a word that comes to mind to describe Lizzy was "Perseverance." She was a fighter who had things she wanted to accomplish for her children. And, she helped transform dreams into a reality.

She made sure the children had access to a good education and she saw their future outside of China. William's brother lived in Canada and Anthony paved the way by finishing his degree in Canada. Belinda studied in England, and in 1976, the rest of the family moved to the United States and settled in San Francisco. Belinda and Anthony rejoined the rest of the family in California.

William and Lizzy were traditional, but they adapted well to living in the United States. William was in his late 50s and Lizzy was in her late 40s when they came to the United States. It couldn't have been easy, but they had goals for their children that needed to be met and they persevered. They enjoyed their lifestyle, more freedoms, and made many friends among the large Chinese population in San Francisco. They also adapted well to traveling around the city by using public transportation.

Delia was only eight-years-old when they moved to San Francisco. Their children all have gratitude for Lizzy and William's decision. They know how strong their parents were to move to the United States in middle age. They were courageous people who gave their children the opportunities they wouldn't have had otherwise. They sacrificed so much and yet they were willing to take that leap for their children.

Delia was the youngest and she was raised in San Francisco. She was on a pre-med track in high school, part of clubs, and even took summer jobs. One of those jobs was at a law firm. Lizzy was very supportive and encouraging. Delia had to pass a swim test to graduate from high school, and Lizzy taught her how to swim. She taught her the breast stroke and told her to practice. Delia passed the test with her mother's help and earned her diploma.

Lizzy was always there for all of her children. When Belinda had her board exam, she was so scared. Lizzy stayed at the hotel with her and helped to boost her confidence. She held her hand and told her not to worry. She couldn't sleep and so her mother stayed up with her. With her mother's support and her own hard work, Belinda passed with no problem.

Lizzy was always thinking of her children. During the 80s, there were a few trips to Hong Kong for Lizzy to visit her family. Thinking of her children, she bought gifts for her children and they are treasured to this day. The family also remembers that Lizzy was multi-talented and good with her hands. She knitted and handmade clothes for her family and they are treasures, too. Delia has a sweater that her mother made 20 years ago and it's still perfect. And, Lizzy handmade the bridesmaid dresses when Belinda got married.

Lizzy was well-educated, well read in Chinese literature, and she spoke Chinese to her children. She helped them to appreciate their heritage every day and reach for their dreams. William and Lizzy were both very proud of their children's achievements. All four of their children went on to become doctors. Anthony became an anesthesiologist. Belinda became a pediatrician. Carson became a radiologist. And, Delia became an internist. Lizzy wanted to make sure her family was well taken care of and found their own success. Each one of their children did exactly that.

Lizzy confided in her family about her own dreams and goals. She told Anthony that she had wanted to become a doctor but she missed the entrance exam. She looked at that missed opportunity as a positive because it was fate. Had she gotten into medicine in China, they would have suffered during the revolution and they never would have moved to the United States. She taught her family to see how something that seems like a disaster, actually turns out better in a way. She also taught her family never to give up and none of her children ever give up. That story really struck a chord with Anthony, because for a woman who was not able to go into medicine, she got all four of her children into medicine. In many ways, through her children's success, she fulfilled her own dreams. Through their hard work and commitment, she saw their great accomplishments and she was grateful.

There's a spirit in the family to carry on what Lizzy taught her children. Her traditions will carry on through the generations. With seven grandchildren, some of them called her Po-Po while others called her Grandma. She loved all of her grandchildren and wanted them to get a good education, be independent, and never give up.

If the children or grandchildren really needed something, they didn't have to wait for a holiday or a birthday to get it. Lizzy was happy to get it for them. She was simple in her approach to life. It wasn't about material items, but it was about her family and giving from the heart. She liked flowers and William bought her many roses over the years, but she was practical, frugal, and private. She wasn't into big celebrations for no reason. She was driven, hard-working, very strong-minded, and a person of stamina who could endure a lot.

Lizzy's purpose in life was to be a high achiever. She worked in Hong Kong as a chief accountant; she worked at Bank of America for 15 years in computerized data entry; she worked in real estate with her husband; and she also worked hard to guide her children in the right direction. She worked hardest never to be a burden to her children. Even when William and Lizzy traveled to Los Angeles to visit family, they took a Greyhound bus and public transportation so no one had to pick them up.

Delia has lived in Virginia for the last 12 years and William and Lizzy traveled there for Delia's wedding and they visited when Austin and Cody were born. There were several trips back and forth to visit. Their most recent trip to Virginia was in February 2010 and they had a wonderful time together. In September, Delia called her mom and told her that her younger son wanted to play guitar and they were starting guitar lessons. Lizzy told Delia that she used to play the guitar. It was comforting to know that the talents were passed to the next generation of children.

William and Lizzy lived in San Francisco from 1976 to 2006. With health changes, they relocated to be closer to their children. All of their children called them and checked in regularly. It was always comforting to hear their supportive voices on the other side of the phone or to visit them in person and see them smile.

Delia visited a couple of weeks ago from Virginia and spent time with her mother. Then last Sunday, Belinda and Carson sat by Lizzy's bedside holding their mother's hands. She didn't pull away, but instead she was comforted by them holding her hands. Anthony joined Belinda and Carson at her bedside, and Lizzy was peaceful seeing three of her children together. She had told her nurses earlier that she was very peaceful, very happy and had no regrets. As her children comforted her, she fell asleep. Not long after, she passed away peacefully.

Lizzy would want her children and grandchildren to be as ambitious as she was in life. There's still a lot more to accomplish but everyone knows that she was so very proud of her children and grandchildren and the achievements she made in all of them.

William will miss his wife. They've been married for nearly 55 years and they dated each other several years before their marriage. They were really a wonderful team and he misses them taking care of each other. They really looked after each other through the decades.

Anthony will miss his mother's encouragement in his life. He will miss her good advice, especially in today's world. The thing that impressed him the most about his mother was that her number one focus was always her family and she never wavered. He has tried to imitate her approach with his own children as he was very proud of her.

Belinda will miss her mother being there for the family. She was always straight forward in her approach and they had such a good relationship.

Carson will miss his mother's warmth, her company and the fact that he could talk to her about anything. Her support was a great comfort to him.

Delia will miss her mother's presence as she's been so supportive through the years. She was always happy to talk on the phone and the first thing she always asked about was her grandchildren. In honor of her mother, Delia is carrying on her mother's traditions with her children. She's put an emphasis on education as homework comes first. She's also making sure that her children learn different languages and maintain their Chinese heritage. She speaks Chinese to her children and sees the value of speaking different languages.

If you have the love of a family, you are rich...and Lizzy was rich in many ways. While the family is grateful for having Lizzy in their lives, the family feels that Lizzy is now at peace.

Lizzy is loved and remembered by her husband William; children Anthony, Belinda, Carson, and Delia; seven grandchildren; her siblings, extended family and close friends.